First, I've had some requests.
Telephalsion wrote:Have your 2000th post be of love and joy...
So, for starters: I'd like to say that I love every one of you and wish to spread to you joy and peace. But when I say that, I really mean that I love the following people, and only them, because everyone else I despise. This was previously dubbed the Cool List:
Jeramyu (also known as: Jera, Emperor Jeramyu, Jer, Jerm, Jerms, Germ, Germs, and Jeralazzo-sama)
Porter (also known as: Pooter)
Fitz (also known as: Fitz)
Glenn (also known as: Gleen, Glen)
fwacho (also known as, and I quote: "a fucking asshole")
Novahn (also known as: New Guy)
Teenr0cker (also known as: That annoying little shit whose AIM windows crashed my PSO games, who followed me here from GameFAQs, and who criticises and makes offensive comments about absolutely everything about me relating to race and hobbies - wait, nah, you're not really on this list, I lied)
Ikzai (also known as: the guy who didn't follow me from GameFAQs but who I've actually met over there on a board I used to regular before coming here, which is kind of cool so he gets on here)
OverlordBill (also known as: pure awesome, shares my every opinion on almost anything)
iamtheverb (also known as: Verb, Bastard Admin)
Rangi (also known as: freak awesome artist)
Otaku no Anime (also known as: Bakazuki, Pervert)
Telephalsion (also known as: That guy I always hated until I just couldn't be bothered anymore, damn spammer)
Sage of the Wise (also known as: what the hell ever happened to him?)
HolsteinCow (also known as: I'm running out of ideas)
Exiled (also known as: the FORMER Idle King)
Iteroth (also known as: uh... that guy who once... did something)
ReaperGal (also known as: the GIRL)
Non-Sequitur (also known as: he's just been around long enough, okay? He doesn't really have any distinguishing features whatsoever to make him specifically cool)
And of course, Lun Calsari, who obviously deserves a seperate mention due to his role as a God.
If I forgot anyone, which I obviously didn't because I'm perfect, remind me so I can ignore you. Or edit this post and pretend it was always there and I never forgot in the first place. Go away, GCM.
Next:
Burning_Flame wrote:It should be a hate list.........
Right, time to complement my message of peace and love with the Hate List I've mentioned so often. Nobody here gets an "Also Known As" because they all suck. Note that some people here I don't really hate, but I find quite entertaining and funny completely by accident. I hope it's obvious who they are; I just have to put them here for the sake of reputation. I also have to put Burning_Flame here just because A) He requested it and B) He earlier said he wasn't on it.
Excell (Just because we're not fighting it doesn't mean I can forgive a good few of his worse assholic acts - I'm still allowed to hate him)
Inderos
Takarious
Bikkel
Cocoa (this is one and the first of of those I mentioned a moment ago)
War (I intentionally put this under the above message for ambiguity; you decide)
Lord_Ehrgeiz
blaksun
Lu Bu (Duh! Go milk a cow and drink from it!)
Burning_Flame
Jabbo (for doubting the wrath of the Illuminati)
Doovy and co.
Duke (for forcing us to use quotation marks for "Rhue" and "Serena", and also for having a disjointed and retarded theory)
Every person to unsarcastically and seriously use 1337 Speak or the Internet slang I dubbed "Shit Speak" - there have been a lot of them here and few particularly memorable, and I can't be bothered checking. Plus there are some on the old forums, too.
Every person to state a theory that either has been said a million times or is complete shit without a good excuse, on all forums old and new.
Once again, remind me if I forgot you.
This list seems shorter, but the last two encompass half the Internet or more. I'd consider posting the Neutral list as well, also known as the No-Flame list, but I'm lazy and nobody requested it anyway.Kensai wrote:impossibles 2000th post should be an account of how he plans on brutally murdering everyone who ever pissed him off.
Man, that'd be a LONG post.
I would do so using the following methods, in a repeating cycle:
Headache, vomiting, temporary insanity, perminant insanity, minor bloating, cramps, itchy feet, bloodshot eyes, loss of and/or thinning hair, mood swings, runny nose, facial blemishes, pale skin, delayed reaction, fever, rash, lack of energy, lower IQ, bad karma, lower post count, lack of computer skillz, urges to play neopets, excessive hair growth, lack of erection, decreasing of manhood, bad CHI, bad Feng Shui, tooth decay, lice, chest pains, desire to lick Ricky Martin's right nipple, lower house resale value, bad automobile transmission, intolerance of alcohol, lack of literacy, MORE STD's, spontanious combustion, chills, lack of appitite, lack of sense of humor, seeing illusions, lowering paychecks and/or GPA, loss of vision or hearing, desire to listen to AFI, achey bones, strep throat, reoccuring computer virusi, spam, your parents finding your pr0n, internal bleeding, uncontrollable bowel movements, desire to lick Ricky Martin's LEFT nipple, de ja vu, bad stock portfolios, an overal soreness, a fear of duct tape, an addiction to glue, poverty, constant 404 errors, that hitman finally catching up to you, alien invasion, desire to go to GW, desire to be a good christian, excessive weight gain, head explodie, demonic levitation, fleas, lack of respect for Bill, being shunned and hated by many, finding an interest in "The one ring to rule them all", lightheadedness, paranoia, twitching, lower back pains, addiction to consuming clay, desire to buy piratable software, ringworms, cancer, tumors, being on the "naughty list", growing a third nipple, having an overall good amount of respect for the French, sweaty feet, nailbiting, paper jam, grey facial hair, and a slight tingle. Also, playing E.T., Big Rigs and Superman 64 for all eternity would be enforced on everyone to receive one of the above.
(credit to Teenr0cker, except the last sentence is property of me)
Now I'm going to give a speech. I'd like to thank nobody, because you all suck. Even the ones I love. Except for the ones who can ban me. This post is dedicated to The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, which will be the best thing ever. If I wasn't so damn lazy I'd have written another novelization chapter to celebrate this amazing event, but I thought all our recent returning posters were significant enough.
Finally, I'd like to say that I'm so fucking glad I can post again after this instead of ignoring everything I see. I'm still allowed to edit this with more samples of 2000-related awesomeness. You know, I'm nearly at 2005, which is pretty important as well. I'll just keep this topic alive until I hit 3000.
Dude, mate, buddy... whatveva.... just please tell me I'm not included in the 'co.' part of that..... I'd rather not exist than be demeaned in such a manner...
