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The first and only official harcore gangsta on this board

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 6:53 am
by Cocoa
It's been a while since I've said anything to any of you, mainly because I've been too busy working on DUMBS revised, platinum, gold, precious medal edition to waste even a moment preaching to the ignorant, unwashed masses.

All though some of you may not believe it, and I am reluctant to admit it, even I am not above gloating from time to time. With that said I would like to proclaim myself Cocoa O mo'frikin' Muerto the first and only "Hardcore Gangsta" to ever post on this forum.

What qualifies one as a "Hardcore Gangsta" you ask? First according to the literature a gangsta "don't give a f!@#." That is a standard that many of you are within judging by your hygene. However I think that in this context "not giving a f!@#" is more of a reference to style than stench.

Also a gangsta must be strapped. I am strapped litteraly and figuratively in a manner that doesn't need to be elaborated on. You can take my word for it because I know I could never slip a lie past anyone on this forum. Yer too durn tootin' 'S' 'M' 'R' 'T' smrt.

Finally and most importantly a true hardcore gangsta must "f!@# the police." This is perhaps the hardest requirment since cops usually don't like being f!@#ed. F!@#ed in this case refering to messing with, mocking, or shaming in some manner. So no, your Mom is not a gangsta for what she did last time John Law came a'knockin'. I can tell you in all honesty I have f!@#ed not one, not two, but three cops all in the same night. All though I will not elaborate on the exact mechanism of the f!@#ing let it be known that the cops were at my mercy and new it. To use the immortal words of 2Pac, "Nigga I hit 'em up."

Now some of you might be afraid of me now, to which I would say, good you should be cause I "don't give a f!@#", I'm strapped, and I "hit 'em up." I hope this doesn't influence what has been up to this point an amicable sycophant/celebrtiy relationship. I will continue to listen to your swooning without bitch slaping you across the internet, no matter how much I want to, because that's just the kind of guy I am. Feel free to tell me anything. Think of me like your uncle, the one who buys you beer, not the one who molests you behind the shed at the family reunion.

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 9:01 am
by Teenr0cker
I.will.find.you.and.I.will.hit.you.with.a.brick.

You wanna know who the original gangsta, as you so aptly put it is? It isn't me, although I partially qualify as your 'gangsta' being 'smrt' and all.

Teenr0cker wrote:Naw, I just have this new way of life called "I don't care chickenfucker", in which, I just don't care.


Pacman on Crack by Bloodhound Gang wrote:We gonna drop this next bomb for a money makin' playa that ain't with us no mo.
Yeah, Notorious B.I.G.
Hell no, we gonna do this for a gangbanging thug that never seen it comin'.
Yeah, Tupac Shakur.
Nah bitch, I'm talkin' 'bout motherfuckin' Falco and shit.
What? Falco?.


Rock me Amadeus,
Rock me Amadeus,
Rock me Amadeus,
Rock me Amadeus.

Tried to O.D. on the Cold-Eeze,
"Golden Girls" got me "Sweatin' To The Oldies",
Hanging out like Double Ds sip Long Island Iced Teas,
Wrote to Mayor McCheese "Send a Shamrock Shake please!",
Three O' Clock on the dot time to cruise for Eighth graders,
Rather tape the Weather Channel so that I can watch it later,
Reruns of Rerun so What's Happening?,
Dee's knocked up and Rog on crack again,
Deep throat a whole Nutty Buddy,
Make whoopie to a batch of Silly Putty,
Make a Spam and Colgate sandwich and ate it,
Go through "National Geographic" and draw panties on the natives,
So I like to dance naked in front of my pets,
But my cat was inattentive so I sent him U.P.S.,
Playin' spin the bottle with my mom,
I watch "Cops" with no pants on.

Must've blown a fuse nothing's going on,
Lamer than the Pope climb the walls like King Kong,
Buggin' out like Tori Spelling's eyes,
Deader than the parents on a Party of Five,
Luciano Pavoratti on a treadmill,
Not going nowhere slim chance we will,
Less hip than Bo Jackson bored like wood,
Dick around like Frankie Goes To Hollywood.

Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it,
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum,
Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it,
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum.

Nowhere to go I can't wake up late,
Just sit around and wait for my Old Spice to activate,
Stalemate jailbait in "My So-Called Life" imprisonment,
Amazing what a good breakfast pickles make isn't it?,
I like to pretend I'm speed reading,
Never lose the sight of the thrill of sneezing,
Don't need a shower today just some Brut by Faberge,
Smell the ass of my jeans clean they'll do another day,
And I recycle I sniff my own farts,
I dial the wrong number hope a conversation starts,
I mean I might as well be listenin' to Journey,
Givin' myself a mullet hook the Flowbee to the Kirby,
Make a prank call pretendin' I'm a mime,
Get stuck in traffic just to pass the time,
Sent a letter in the mail in Braille to Johnny Quest,
Send me back my Etch-A-Sketch.

Must've blown a fuse nothing's going on,
Lamer than the Pope climb the walls like King Kong,
Buggin' out like Tori Spelling's eyes,
Deader than the parents on a Party of Five,
Luciano Pavoratti on a treadmill,
Not going nowhere slim chance we will,
Less hip than Bo Jackson, bored like wood,
Dick around like Frankie Goes To Hollywood.

Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it,
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum,
Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it,
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum.

I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums,
When you wanna cum,
I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums,
When you wanna cum,
I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums,
When you wanna cum,
I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums,
When you wanna cum.

Yo yo yo yo yo! What it is motherfuckers?
Aw shit, here comes Pac-Man.
Hey Pac-Man, what's up?
Me you bitches! I'm high on crack! Wanna freebase?
No Pac-Man drugs are bad!
Nope can't help you man.
Pussies. Whoa! Holy shit!

Must've blown a fuse nothing's going on,
Lamer than the Pope climb the walls like King Kong,
Buggin' out like Tori Spelling's eyes,
Deader than the parents on a Party of Five,
Luciano Pavoratti on a treadmill,
Not going nowhere slim chance we will,
Less hip than Bo Jackson bored like wood,
Dick around like Frankie Goes To Hollywood.

Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it,
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum,
Relax don't do it when you wanna go to it,
Relax don't do it when you wanna cum,

Holy macaroni,
Holy macaroni,
Holy macaroni,
Holy macaroni.


And THAT, Reaper and gentlemen, is the ode to the hardest to the core gangster ever.

And one more thing. I'm ever-so-positive now that I am glad I'm adopted, lest I fear any personality flaws my "uncle" has.


~I say goodday sir!

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 10:26 am
by Porter
Can you dunk a basketball?

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 12:11 pm
by Strayed Wanderer
Ya' know, I actually read that, and I think I got lost a paragraph in.

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 5:43 pm
by ericfantasy17
Cocoa you really should kill yourself.........

A true gangster would not be on a video game forum, A wannabe probably would. We are afraid of you? I'm not afraid of you. As a matter of fact im gonna tell the same thing to you that i tell to every poser i have to put up with in school. TRY HARDER!!! Do what gangsters do. I say that cause if you go out and and get shot at or do alot of drugs the chances of you dying are really good.

Holla!!!

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 5:45 pm
by AznChipmunk
Duuude! Were not of you banned?!!? :shock: :shock:

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 5:57 pm
by Sage Of The Wise
Wow, I may not be a "Hardcore Gangsta", but atleast I have the guts to actually write the word fuck.

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 6:39 pm
by Strayed Wanderer
Haha, I didn't even realize that. How in hell could you censor the third greatest word in the english language?

fuckity fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuckity fuck fuckity fuck fuck.

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 8:03 pm
by Teenr0cker
What are the first 2?

PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 9:36 pm
by AznChipmunk
Asian and Cheese. (Rice is 2.5)

PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2005 1:11 am
by Impossible
Jera. Remember when you said you would ban ericdipshit17's IP as soon as he posted? Yeah, what happened to that?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2005 1:17 am
by Teenr0cker
//I hate newbies.cpp
//This is a program written to express my hatred of newbies.
//Ideally compiled in Borland 5.0 or higher.

#include iomanip.h
#include conio.h
#include iostream.h

void Hatred(char hate_msg);

int main()
{
Hatred(char hate_msg);
cout<<Press any key to continue...newb"<<endl<<endl;
getch();
return 0;
}

Hatred(char hate_msg)
{
hate_msg
name

cout<<"Please enter your name"<<endl<<endl;
cin>>name;
cout<<endl<<endl;
hate_msg = name "is a friggin newb";
}

//Pretty friggin good since I don't have a compiler installed.

PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2005 5:30 am
by CJ
Gangstas are pussy ass bitches who never fight their own fights but instead, get their brothers or their friends to do their fighting for them.

And when in a fight, it is usually 2 or more gangstas against 1 person.

Not saying that cocoa is like this of course. :)

PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2005 6:20 am
by Forerunner
I agree entirely CJ, most gangsta's are just grown up bullies who think that making up stupid words and being illiterate is cool.

...but it's really hard to give you credit for it when your signature is telling me that the president buys your ass.

PostPosted: Fri Nov 11, 2005 11:39 pm
by Kyazu
pffft the hardest core gangsta has to be Steven Hawking

i mean look at his bling and his rides

can i say GGED yet? (YES I DID SAY GGED NOV NOW STFU)(i know you stole it from that one guy from SC but i stole it and used it GOOD GAMED bitch)