Crestfallen Studios

I was working and mom tells me to get the phone.

<Shindy> Hello?
<Some old woman> Is this the place where they have a sale out for a house near XXXXX?
<Shindy> No... you have the wrong number.
<Old woman> Na ah you lying to me. Is this 267-XXX-XXXX?
<Shindy> ... This is 215-XXX-XXXX
<Old woman> No you just trying to keep me out. Stop there ain't nuthing you can do 'bout it I'll eventually find out and there ain't nuthing you can do 'bout it.
<Shindy> This is XXX Cleaners near the XXXXXX train station...
<Old woman> Oh I got the right number there is no doubt 'bout dat. I'll find out eventually... <INSERT LONG SPEECH HERE> I don't know if this is SEGREGATION or not but <INSERT SECOND PART> Blah blah blah.
<Shindy> ........................ You really, really have the wrong phone number.
<Old woman> It's not?
<Shindy> Yeah... this is...
<Old woman> YOU LYING LIKE A DOG! You trying to keep me out <Insert third part>
<Shindy> (Did she just call me a dog? That's it she's gonna get azn'ed!)
<Background noise> %#@$&@%@#$&%@#&
<Old woman> I'll try again.
<Shindy> ..................................................................................

So yeah. What's your way of dealing with annoying phone calls? Normally I'd just cuss and press DC but mom and her friend was nearby O.O

I usually humor them. That's when I would don a southern accent and say "you're damn right we're tryin to keep you folks out"

I pretend to have some sort of breakdown over the phone where I forget who I am, where I am and who I'm talking to.

Shindy wrote:<Shindy> This is XXX Cleaners

Firstly, I know they're X'ed out so people don't harass you and steal your identity etc. etc. but it's so much nicer to imagine you live in Porn-ville, working at the XXX! Cleaners near the Stripper Station.

Secondly, it depends on how tired I am. If I be tired I just swear and hang up. If I be awake I wait until a suitable moment before embarking on a massive rant in an attempt to belittle every facet of the caller's personality and life.

If the caller's trying to sell you something, I find it's most fun to act really interested in whatever they're selling, ask lots of questions and behave enthusiastically about whatever new, high-tech, form of soundproof glass they're trying to sell you. When they ask you how many you want or what your details are just tell them you don't actually want any and you're just interested in the product itself, or you were just making smalltalk, OR you were just lonely and needed a chat. It's quite amusing how their voices that are so full of hope and glee that they've made a sale turn to depression, frustration and confusion.

Fitz Tayo wrote:If the caller's trying to sell you something, I find it's most fun to act really interested in whatever they're selling, ask lots of questions and behave enthusiastically about whatever new, high-tech, form of soundproof glass they're trying to sell you. When they ask you how many you want or what your details are just tell them you don't actually want any and you're just interested in the product itself, or you were just making smalltalk, OR you were just lonely and needed a chat. It's quite amusing how their voices that are so full of hope and glee that they've made a sale turn to depression, frustration and confusion.

This right here is the EPITOME of forgetting that it's a real person, hahaha. One of my best friends was a telemarketer for a while...apparently it's a really lame job in and of itself. Unless you're foreign.

The trick is to sell them something. I convinced some guy who was trying to sell me a mobile phone to get a quote on some double glazing.

Sometimes there are wierd phone calls where my schizo cousin phones up and doesn't say anything but keep repeatedly phoning up in the same day. Usually by the third time I pretend to be either an answering machine, a telemarketer, another telemarketer or some DIY store.

Once some crazy woman phoned up, quite similar to the one in Shindy's story. I just told her to fuck off after a while but she kept phoning back. I just then made up some story about being decended from German Jews and accused her of being a neo nazi. It was funneh.

I hang up on them mid-sentence and go back to sleep (I'm almost always sleeping). They honestly don't warrant the effort of genuine anger.