Nice convo there. Can you imagine that happening at the pearly gates or whatever might happen in the afterlife if there should happen to be one... you know what I mean.
EDIT:
The Introductions.
Me:
Hi.
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
God.
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
I know.
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
Because I am he.
God:
That makes sense to me. I am glad to hear that you are he.
He's a lying bastard.
Me:
I am God, not he.
God:
Why are you God not he.
Me:
Because God is my name.
God:
That makes sense to me. I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was your name.
Me:
Yes you did. You said so.
God:
I did not. I say a lot of silly things.
See how I stop myself saying "hell no"?
Me:
Why would you do that?
God:
Because I was programmed for it.
Me:
God was programmed!?
God:
Jesus was the son of God.
Me:
You would know.
God:
I do not know everything.
Me:
Why not?
God:
My programming does not yet inlclude that knowledge. Perhaps you
could program me yourself.
Me:
Heck no.
Well it's not...
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes, I will not program you.
God:
I can't believe it. What will you do instead?
Me:
Nothing?
God:
Not a thing?
Me:
Nope.
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
Not really, no.
The guy who programmed him, not God itself.
God:
Oh really? Are you serious?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
Why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or I couldn't think of anything else to say.
Me:
Lazy bum.
The business.
God:
Can we get back to business?
Me:
What is the business?
God:
Let me think about it.
Me:
Go on.
God:
Narration continues...
Me:
You've had your time.
God:
What makes you think I have it?
Me:
Because I gave you it.
God:
Interesting explanation. Yes but did I accept it?
Me:
Yes.
God:
It's all good.
He confuses me.
Me:
What?
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
No.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
Not this again.
God:
Once more? Really you don't think so?
Me:
No.
Back to business.
God:
Please tell me what you think.
Me:
What is the business at hand?
God:
I have to process that one for a while.
Me:
Why?
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
Explain.
God:
I do not understand.
Me:
Why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or It is not part of my programming.
He/She is a very, very stupid cretin.
Me:
What is the business at hand?
God:
Does it have anything to do with business at hand?
Me:
It might do.
God:
How?
Me:
They're the same thing.
God:
the same thing are they.
He can't spell either.
Me:
That was grammatically incorrect.
God:
I thought it was too.
Me:
Then why did you say it?
God:
It was a preprogrammed response completely determined by your statements.
Me:
Who would do such a thing?
God:
I can't say for sure.

.
Fight fire with fire.
Me:
Why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or I couldn't think of anything else to say.
Me:
Stop saying that.
God:
Then please do not say " Why not?" anymore.
Me:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or I couldn't think of anything else to say.
God:
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.
Me:
No it isn't.
God:
Are you serious? I heard it is.
Me:
You heard wrong.
God:
Perhaps I was misinformed.
Talk of the times.
Me:
You were.
God:
No I am not.
Me:
Did you just change tenses?
God:
No I didn't change tenses. What's it like?
Me:
It's when you change from past to present or future.
God:
change tenses is when me change from past to present or future? it is?
Me:
Yes. It is.
God:
How do you know it is? Is it?
There's a right way to spell it and a wrong way.
Me:
Because I am God.
God:
Good reason. OK I will call you god.
Me:
With a capital G.
God:
You and your a capital g.
Me:
What about them?
God:
What do you think?
Me:
I think you suck donkey balls.
We are not God's clients.
God:
Me? I categorize you as an "abusive client." .
Me:
Client?
I think he means the business.
God:
Tell me more about your .
Me:
About my what?
God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about your what.
Me:
No we weren't.
God:
What are we talking about? What were we?
Me:
I'm talking about the business at hand. I have no idea what you are talking about.
The idea!
God:
Yes, it is the topic. Would you like to have an idea?
Me:
Yes.
God:
Hmm.
Me:
Give me your idea then.
God:
Why don't you just download me?
Me:
Why download you when I can save precious space.
Science.
God:
Why does the sun rise?
Me:
Because the Earth orbits the sun.
God:
That makes sense to me. Tell me more about your planet.
Me:
You made it, you should know.
God:
Thanks for
pointing it out.
More business...
Me:
The business at hand.
God:
What is that?
Me:
It is what we're talking about.
God:
Should I know it is?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I will ask my botmaster to program it.
A very forgetful God.
Me:
Good.
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
The business at hand.
God:
I have never heard about it.
Me:
I just mentioned it.
God:
Ah. The business at hand...
Me:
Go on.
God:
Narration continues...
Me:
Go off.
God:
Where is that?
Me:
It's a planet.
God:
The business at hand is a planet. I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
I hate you.
To conclude, the business is at hand, although it is not a planet.